Mad World
by Aishi-Cc
Summary: A little 4x3 One Shot named for a song that is rather addicting once you listen to it once, enjoy.


Ok yes I was listening to 'Mad World' _waaaaaay_ too much while I was typing this but the song rather fits the show eh? Anyway if you want to listen to the song but don't have it on your computer then look her up on YouTube, there is a Gundam Wing one. This fic is based on a Doujinshi named 'Porcelain' and will be posted in my PhotoBucket gallery Aishi-Cc soon; it's dubbed so you can read it. After reading it this fic will be all duh, keke, so look and listen if you wish to try and follow my crazy ass mind for about five minutes.

**WarNinGs**: AU, One Shot, OCCish, 4x3.

**Betaed by Sylvania, she likes a more hands on Quatre. **

**Aishi Say**

"_**Look right through me, look right through me  
And I find it kind of funny  
I find it kind of sad  
The dreams in which I'm dying  
Are the best I've ever had  
I find it hard to tell you  
I find it hard to take**_"

Mad World Lyrics…kindda had to right?

**It's a m**_**aaaaaaa**_**d wo**_**rrr**_**ld**

"Master Quatre I _must_ say again I believe this is a foolish and possibly dangerous action, he may pilot a similar suit but that could mean any number of things. The man who gave you yours never mentioned ally suits to you, there has to be a reason for that…Master Quatre?" Rashid questioned, his ranting of negative points pausing as he eyed his master, "Quatre?"

"Hm? Oh well I am sure there was a reason for that but that does not mean it has to be a bad one, he just may not have known others were being sent at all. I will _not_ assume he is my enemy until he gives me no other option, attacking me was a natural response, for all we know he was ordered to." Quatre shook his head at his second father, he loved the man but he had never met anyone so paranoid and untrusting in his life, and he grew up around businessmen.

"That may very well be so but, if that is the case who knows what other orders he has been given, I do not want to see you hurt. You are a fine pilot but in hand to hand you are lacking, he looks like the type that is not," Rashid knew the body of a fighter when he saw one and that youth was one sure as Quatre was gentle.

"My gifts have yet to fail me Rashid if they sense a threat I will call you, but as long as he behaves so shall we, we are not OZ soldiers and so we will be civil." Quatre stopped in front of the door his gifts alerted him to, "You can stand watch if you want but I am willing to risk it."

Rashid sighed but bowed, "As you wish, I will be near if you do need me, I hope you are right my young friend."

"So do I Rashid so do I," Quatre agreed turning from the tall man with a gentle smile, he hoped he was right as well.

**It's a m**_**aaaaaaa**_**d wo**_**rrr**_**ld**

Quatre walked into the sunlit room, catching sight of the stranger instantly, he was standing near a window with his arms crossed, eyes closed, and head tilted down. For a moment Quatre wondered if he was sleeping, he was not use to people holding so still, he had heard fighters developed impressive muscle control but he had never really seen it. Taking his first really good look at the other young man he smiled, he had watched him much since he was brought there but he had not noticed how beautiful he was before. He had been watching for any sign of attack or injury, he had not been paying much attention to his appearance beyond that, in fact, he could not even remember his eye color. Feeling a little ashamed about that he sighed softly, closing his eyes and reaching out with his mind gently. Mental fingers brushed an icy wall and he shivered, cold beauty seemed so fitting if not sad. If he could get some idea about him he could try his hand at making friends but he could not even pick up his mood, not that he could not guess it. Opening his eyes he studied the young man, he had learned not to rely solely on his powers to read people, they did not work on everyone. The tall, fast looking frame was still and ready if not tense, this was unknown territory and he was not about to relax completely anytime soon. Watching him made Quatre think of a jaguar lounging in a tree, it may look peaceful but it could still pounce on you at any moment. Glancing at his violin case he smiled as a thought crossed his mind, music soothed beasts so why not people too?

Pale fingers opened the case and removed the violin and bow, he loved music; it connected people without needing to say a thing, the perfect langue. Tucking the violin under his chin he began to play slowly, he sensed eyes on him but he did not open his own. Just starting to play violin had to seem strange so he was not about to begrudge the other for their curiosity, it was something to work with. Hands paused when he swore he heard cold steel, pale eyes opened with their own curiosity and he blinked, the nameless stranger had taken a flute. Quatre never would have guessed such a silent pilot could play anything let alone be willing to play with him, it confused him and the stranger knew it. Smiling Quatre began to play again, surprised when the flute followed along with the same practiced elegance he had, who was this young man?

**It's a m**_**aaaaaaa**_**d wo**_**rrr**_**ld**

Trowa listened to the blonde enter the room, he could tell from the footsteps it was him and no one else, his steps were light and that seemed to fit him. He could feel the other's eyes on him and he ignored them, keeping his own gaze to himself, the blonde was not about to attack him, he knew that much. For a moment he swore he could feel the other's confusion but that was quickly dismissed, the blonde was likely confused, he did not have to see him to know it. A case being opened got his attention, his hidden eye opened and he watched the blonde turn with a violin, not surprising considering what else lay about the room. Intrigued, both eyes opened when he began to play, it was nothing he knew but it was simple to follow, similar to the blonde himself. Dark gaze turned to a nearby case before glancing back to the blonde, frowning in thought, was he being challenged or tested? The former mercenary was unsure but he would not fail to this fragile looking pilot either, he was a Gundam pilot as well after all. Opening the case he scanned the contents, choosing a weapon he knew would confuse the blonde even more, fellow Gundam pilot or not, it did not make him a friend. Bringing cold metal to his lips he played a few notes. The other paused for a moment before starting again, not saying a word, he did not need to see him to know he was smiling. That was fine by him, he could be happy if he wished, as long as he stayed out of his way he did not care how the blonde felt, he was nothing to him.

**It's a m**_**aaaaaaa**_**d wo**_**rrr**_**ld**

Quatre sighed as he reentered the room; the nameless young man was still there and still watching the sky. Walking up to him slowly he stopped to look up at the sky as well, the stars looked so different from below, he rather liked them. "They are beautiful aren't they?" The stranger did not even glance at him and Quatre frowned, he had barely acknowledged his presences after joining him, he was not sure what he had done. He had seen the stranger was treated well so he did not see what he was so cold about, unless it was him. "Excuse me? If I have done something to offend you I am very sorry, but there is no reason to treat me so coldly. I have not mistreated you, in fact I have tried to befriend you but it is hard to do when you won't even look at me."

A dark eyed pilot turned on the blonde, head tilting slightly as he studied him, "I am not offended, I have no need for friendship." Trowa frowned slightly when the blonde gave him a hurt look, how someone this emotional ever became a pilot was beyond him.

"Yes you do, we all do. We have similar suits that means we are on the same side, we shouldn't be fighting each other." Quatre wanted to whirl the other pilot around and shake him; did his intentions mean anything to him? What did he have to do to be treated like a human being by this young man, was that even possible? '_Why are you so cold? If I tried to touch you would you attack or just stand there unmoved like you are right now? Who are you?'_ "I'm not a threat to you…do you believe that?" Light aqua eyes studied the dark green-eyed youth as he just stood there unmoving and seemingly unmoved as well, words did not seem to work.

"I know, if I thought you were you would be dead and I would be long gone," Trowa answered evenly, he did not stay where it was not safe. He had been given no orders regarding fellow Gundams and so he would destroy any who got in his way, the same side was relative anyway.

Quatre took a step back, he did not want to believe Rashid had a point about this young man; he was another pilot so they should be allies. Taking a step forward he shook his head, "Is there any way we can at least be allies? I came here to fight Oz not you, or anyone else not associated with that group, we can help each other."

"I need no help from you nor did I ask for any, we have the same goals nothing more," Trowa was used to being ignored for the most part, this blonde did not seem to want to leave him alone.

Quatre bit his lip, looking up through messy gold bangs, "Do you hate me?" It was the only reason he could think of for the other's attitude towards him, the idea of the first should-be ally he met turning out to hate him hurt. He had tried being nice, accommodating, even leaving him alone for a while as he saw to things, but he had not softened the other's eyes in the slightest.

Trowa turned to blink at the shorter pilot, not even bothering to control the moment of surprise. The fragile looking blonde was as emotional as he was beautiful, he knew the blonde was but beauty was not his concern. "I do not know you, and you do not know me."

"So ask! I will tell you anything you want to know _if_ you are just willing to ask…I trust you, stranger, even if you refuse to trust me." Quatre crossed his arms, shivering a bit from the chill and wishing he was wearing his vest, "Do you think me foolish?"

Trowa watched the blonde shiver a bit as he thought about the offer, no one had been willing to bear their soul to him before and it felt strange. Sighing softly he closed his eyes, looking away, it was hard to be blunt when a child like face was pleading with him, he did not like being looked at like that. "Perhaps I do, what does it matter what I think of you anyway?"

Quatre folded his hands, confused when the other sighed and looked away, "I do want to be your friend even if you say you do not need one…would it be so bad to have one anyway?" Surely having one would not kill him, it had never killed Quatre and now that he knew what a friend was worth he wanted more. This young man with his deep dark eyes was as quiet and mysterious as his forest gaze and he wished to learn more about him, he needed to learn more about him.

Trowa sighed again, feeling tired, ignoring the other's pleas and kindness was tiring, it was not something he was use to ignoring, "Perhaps…I will consider it."

Quatre took Trowa's hands before he even realized he had reached out for him, "I have many resources at my disposal and as you said already, I am not a threat to you." The paler youth smiled, squeezing his hands before realizing what he had done, biting his lip he blushed and quickly stepped away. "I…forgive me I had no right to touch you…please accept my humble apologizes."

Trowa blinked down at the smiling blonde, his hands were very warm despite his earlier shiver, he shook his head at his apology what was it with this guy? "Quatre it's alright, you just got caught up, it's not like you hurt me or anything."

Quatre looked back up, staring into eyes so alien to him, he smiled when he saw they had softened just a bit, he was not upset, "You used my name…"

"So? I know yours so why not use it? You are a strange one do you know this?" Trowa frowned at the awe struck Quatre, it was just a name did it really matter that much to him?

"I knew we could be friends if you just relaxed a little, it's not so hard now is it?" Quatre asked smiling reaching out with his mind once more, he was curious about the youth with the beautiful eyes. '_I can't touch his heart or his mind…I have never met anyone as mysterious or as beautiful as you…nameless one.'_

"No…I never said we were friends," Trowa crossed his arms, frowning a bit in thought, the littlest things seemed to make this blonde insanely happy. In all his years he had never meet anyone like him, his complete opposite in all things, strange how calming he could be if not fought. Tilting his head at him he noted the smile had not even dimmed, "What are you so happy about anyway?"

"You don't hate me," Quatre answered, just watching him, the moonlight cast a silver sheen to the emerald and he rather liked the look.

"I already told you that…are you alright?" Trowa frowned at him, just a little bit concerned, if the blonde ended up passing out or something he knew he would be blamed, and that would lead to fighting.

Quatre reached up slowly and touched an angular cheek, watching dark eyes watch him right back, he smiled when he did not tense or try to separate them. '_That's right I'm not your enemy you don't have to fear me…ever.'_ He blinked when his wrist was taken suddenly, a strong grip twisting it just enough to hurt, why he was not sure. '_He's so strong! It hurts and I'm afraid…but his hand is warm.'_ Ignoring the pain Quatre took a step forward and touched clenched fingers, "You can't make me attack you…it's alright, you can let go now."

Trowa glanced down at the gentle fingers resting on his own and he released the blonde, he would not fight him even to get away and that did make him a fool, "Why?"

Quatre smiled at the confused young man, he looked so cute that way and it was nothing like the cold mask he had been wearing most of the time. "As I said, we shouldn't be fighting each other." Pale figures returned to a darker face before pale lips moved to touch slightly parted ones for a moment, a heartbeat could feel so much longer when one was in love. Moving away Quatre smiled at the open confusion, placing a finger to the other's lips before he could recover enough to speak, "Rest well my friend, do not forget you have one safe place to return to in this world, good night."

Trowa watched the blonde take a step back, smiling at him; he had no idea how to react to this young man. The smiling youth grinned in amusement as he backed towards the door and opened it without turning, "Why…why did you do that?"

Quatre tilted his head at him, "Do you really need to ask me that? I kissed you because I feel connected to you, there's something about you that speaks to me." Gentle eyes looked up through messy light colored bangs as he watched the other frown at him in thought, "Do you feel anything?"

Trowa sighed as he looked away from the blonde, frowning in thought, he was so confusing! It was not something he was used to. Turning he walked up to him, crossing his arms as he stopped, "Yes confused, you know nothing about me yet you claim to feel connected, connected to what?"

Pale fingers reached out and rested lightly on the other's chest with a slight smile, "Why this of course. You may act as heartless as you wish but I know you can feel…and just as deeply as I can if you would allow yourself to." Quatre looked up studying shadowed eyes, "Even animals feel many things we humans do and perhaps are just as mystified as we are."

"I have survived this long as I am, I see no reason to change now, you know nothing about me so do not presume you can tell me how I feel." Trowa brushed the other's hand away dismissively, "Now move aside."

Quatre frowned as his hand was brushed away like some annoyance, frowning even deeper he met the other's cold eyes. There was no doubt in his mind this young man was more than capable of killing him many times over before he could even react but he was not sure if he would, he just hoped he would not. Doing his best to look as if he was not disheartened by the other's order the pale blonde gave him an even look, "And if I refuse to?"

Trowa slammed his open palm into the door over Quarter's shoulder getting a jump out of the blonde from the sound as well as the force he could feel along his spine, he leaned close. "Very simple, I will remove you as I do every other obstacle in my path, now will you move or do I have to move you?"

Quatre took a quick breath and tried to settle his nerves, he had never felt such raw force before and he knew that was restraint. The other's words did nothing to calm him, he was sure he would fling him to a wall or some other painful method of removal if he did not move, yet he stayed where he was. It was stupid but while this young man terrified the sensible part of him another knew he would not really hurt him, not like he threatened. "This is my home and I give the orders here, if you want me to move then move me." Pale slender arms snaked around the other's high collar as he leaned up kissing him while he was frowning, "That is if you really want to."

Once again the fragile looking blonde pressed his pale lips against his own, and once again he was not harmed for doing so. Trowa frowned at the comment, not liking being challenged, he should just push him aside and walk out but he made no move against the blonde, "Do you usually enjoy testing your luck or is it just with me?"

"I do not enjoy testing anyone's luck but I just can't help it, I want to be close to you and if that means risking my life then so be it." Quatre smiled when the nameless youth did not move to detach or attack him, he just stared at him like he was mad and maybe he was. "I have never met another like you and I must confess…I love you, since you stepped out of your Gundam I have wanted to be close to you and now," pale arms tighten their grip slightly, "And now I have you right where I want you."

Green stare narrowed, "Only because I allow it, do not forget you are too weak to keep me here against my will." Trowa was not sure why he was allowing it but he was and was not about to let this clingy pilot think he had some sort of hold on him, "How you feel is not my concern."

"How can you say that? I would think the feelings of one whose arms are around your neck would be very much your concern…or would it only matter if it were my hands around your neck?" Quatre had never met anyone so frustrating in his life; he did not seem to care about anything but his precious mission. '_Don't you see life is not just missions and the time in between them? What can I do to make you see there can be so much more to live for? Tell me how to reach you?'_

Trowa tilted his head at him questionably, "Do you even have the strength to choke the life from another?" The gold in long bangs caught the light as the taller youth shook his head, "Even if you do you couldn't look someone in the eyes as you kill them, you don't have the stomach for killing."

"Do I don't, I hate it…I hate killing but I have to, to defend what I love I have to kill…you don't love anything do you? Taking human life means nothing to you at all; it's just something you do, like breathing." Quatre knew it, he didn't need his gifts to betray the ice in this young man's heart, he could see it in his eyes; the eyes of a killer. Pale lids fell with a soft sigh-like sound, "You are everything I hate in my enemies, the very opposite of what my family stands for but I…I can't hate you."

"Hating me would not change who I am, just as claiming to love me has not. I am a soldier and that is all I have ever been, all I am meant to be." Trowa knew that well, his life had always been war and so his death would come in war as well, so was the life of a soldier.

"You only think that because that is all you have ever been taught, I can teach you to be more than some soldier, I know I can." Quatre could feel there was gentleness beneath the ice, it was buried well but his gifts could penetrate any darkness with time. "I fight to protect something dear to me and I think you would do well if you had a nobler cause then just following orders."

"A soldier's purpose is to follow orders, if you choose to die for some ideal so be it, it is your life to risk as you see fit." High-minded ideals were never of much importance to Trowa, those who started wars were the ones who had to have them, not the everyday soldiers who fought them.

Quatre frowned, it was good he believed everyone was free to live and fight as they chose but he could tell from the tone he was not about to adopt some higher cause anytime soon. "I think you've been fighting so long you've forgotten how to do anything else…that is so very sad."

"You cannot forget what you never learned, I have always been a soldier nothing more, you should not concern yourself so much with my past." Pity was not something he was used to and so he tried to just ignore it, Trowa had learned to ignore things rather well in his short life.

"You're right, I can't change your past anymore than I can my own, but I will try to change your future, that I can change." Quatre knew he would fight him but he did not care, he would save the world and the colonies but he would also save this young man. Green eyes blinked and the blonde knew why, he was not expecting him to agree with him, lips parted, likely to inform him he would not be allowed to change anything, and the fragile blonde cut the words off with his mouth. He did not care how hard he fought, he was not going to let him win even if he had to fight him every day he would do so, he fought to protect his loved ones and he had already confessed to loving this strange young man. Slender fingers dug into dark cloth as he deepened his kiss and tightened his grip on the nameless youth in his arms, he was not sure how he would take all of this but he was not about to make it easy to detach him. Trowa was not all that surprised when Quatre kissed him again, he seemed to think if he did it enough he would get him to change. No it was not the kiss itself, but was the force that confused him, this fragile child-like pilot was stronger than he looked, and it was hard to fight a form of attack he had no defense for. Slipping his left arm around a slender waist, the taller pilot relaxed his right arm as he held the blonde; his attack was rather effective, he never would have guessed. Quatre pulled away slowly, smiling as dark eyes opened and blinked at him questioningly, "See feeling something isn't so bad now is it?"

Trowa frowned at the smiling blonde, he was annoyed with him and annoyed with himself for letting the blonde get to him. His frown did nothing to dim the smile and so he just sighed, bowing his head in defeat, there were worse people to lose to, "No."

Quatre reached out and lifted the other's chin with a single finger, "It's alright nameless one, I don't use my friends' weakness against them." The blonde had no desire try and control his fellow pilot, all he wanted was for him to relax and see they did not have to fight. "If you would like I can show you to your room now? I would imagine you wish to head out as soon as you can tomorrow, I will see to it."

Trowa blinked at him, "You won't try and keep me here? I do not understand." The blonde had confessed he had feelings for him and this was his base, why would he just let him go so easily? It made no logical sense to him but logic was failing him often today, everything had to fail once and a while, that was life.

"I would never do such a thing, you are not a prisoner and so free to come and go as you please. I would love it if you would stay but I know you won't, not now, our goal may be the same but I fear our mission is not just yet." Quatre had no doubt he had been sent to destroy far worse than Quatre had been ordered to, someone so cold was perfect for wiping a base worth of people as ordered. Slipping from his loose grip the blonde opened the door, nodding to Rashid, "Come then, I will see to having my men ready your Gundam for the morning."

Rashid watched the young man walk out of the room not saying a word, which was hardly something new, "Master Quatre?" Dark eyes narrowed as he watched the young man closely, he was behaving at least, it was a start.

"It is alright Rashid, he will be leavening in the morning," Quatre answered, wishing he would stay longer but there would be other times, he knew it.

Rashid nodded, watching his protectorate as he spoke of his mission to the quiet youth, not surprised but not happy, "As you wish Master Quatre."

**It's a m**_**aaaaaaa**_**d wo**_**rrr**_**ld**

"So should I tell them early or late morning?" Quatre asked as the still nameless youth opened the door, pleased when he paused, "Whichever is fine by us, we tend to be morning people around here."

Trowa nodded seeing the logic in that, "Late will be fine, I have no mission tomorrow so there is no rush."

Quatre sighed softly, "Do you think there are others like us out there right now?" It would not surprise him in the least, where there was one they was normally another when it came to suits.

"Since there are five colonies clusters it is safe to assume there are three others out there somewhere, that does not mean they are friendly." Trowa warned, knowing full well the blonde would ignore him, his compassion might be an asset to him but it was likely to get him killed if he was not careful.

"Well you were hardly what I would call friendly at first so I will take my chances, besides I am a Gundam pilot." Quatre would try to make friends even if it meant risking his life; he had gotten a foothold with this pilot so there was a chance.

"True, but if you kiss them all one may just shoot you for your trouble," Trowa informed him, lifting a pale chin to meet questioning eyes. Leaning down he kissed the paler youth for a moment before releasing him, "I will see you in the morning Quatre."

"Good night," Quatre smiled, turning as the door closed and heading towards his own room feeling very good about the future. He would run into the walking machine gun and its pilot again and he would see about picking up where they left off then, for now they had to part ways. Smiling he hit the intercom on his wall, "Please see the other Gundam is ready to move by morning, thank you all for your hard work." Sitting down on his bed he laughed, thinking about what the other had said about kissing the others, the idea was amusing even if he would never go around kissing strangers. He still could not believe he had kissed a nameless young man once let alone over and over again, blushing fiercely all the embarrassment he would have felt came to him and he flopped back. "Oh Allah I am in trouble now."

**It's a m**_**aaaaaaa**_**d wo**_**rrr**_**ld**

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